Homemade... what?

Sorry the formatting is so strange, blogger is being dumb - and I'm too lazy to fix it.

Hey everyone!!!  Still staying super busy with this job of mine, and still suffering from excessive tiredness.  I'm pretty sure it's about time to go to the doctor... but I'm still kind of hoping it's the new schedule and things will get better soon.

Anyway - I hate deodorant.  Really, I do.  I still wear it every day, though.  For years, I've had problems with deodorant either dying my shirts yellow or white in an inconvenient spot and/or causing irritation on my underarms.  I have SUUUPER sensitive skin and a diagnosis of keratosis pilaris, which is where the same stuff that makes your nails gets stuck in your pores.  If you ever noticed how red my arms are... this is why.  Unfortunately, there is no cure so I just do my best (lots of exfoliating and unscented lotions).  Fortunately, it has gotten a lot better than when I was young.  Either people are politer and don't ask (or spread rumors that I'm diseased and it's catching...) or my arms don't get as red (or purple in the case of me getting cold...).  So ANYWAY - I've set out on a mission to go natural in order to help my skin out a bit and here is the first step.

How to Make Your Own Deodorant
1/4 cup baking soda
1/4 cup arrowroot powder 
4 tablespoons coconut oil
10 drops/shakes grapefruit essential oil
A tin or jar with lid


In a bowl, stir together dry ingredients, then add oils gradually until you like the consistency, mixing with a fork. Store in a closed container at room temp. (If the mixture seems too soft, try refrigerating it for a bit to firm it up.)


To apply, scoop up a bit with your finger, hold it against your skin for a couple seconds so it melts a little, then rub around.


This is still in the trying out stage - so I don't have a testimony of it yet, but I'll keep you updated. If it works out, I'm going to make a guy scented one for Justin.  The only thing I found was that the coconut oil was very flaky, like cold butter (even though it wasn't cold) so in order to achieve the pasty consistency, I put it in the microwave for 10 seconds and then was able to stir it in better.  Also, I used sweet orange essential oil because Whole Foods was all out of grapefruit.  


This makes enough deodorant for 4 or 5 months.  I'm not sure what the cost would be because I already threw away the receipt, but I still have plenty of ingredients to make more deodorant - so I think that combined with the fact that I won't be shoving aluminum in my pores makes it all worth it.  
Here's what I have coming up next:


Four Homemade Cleaners
Liquid Handsoap
Homemade Body Wash
How to Clean Your Face Naturally
High Efficiency Laundry Detergent
Homemade Dishwasher Detergent


Check it out!

I gotta get used to this.

New job.  New schedule.  New Amy.

So, in case you haven't heard - I LURVE my new job!  Everyone has been pretty nice and for the most part I've been busy and proactive.  However, this job makes me tired in a completely different way than my old job did.  Rather than 2 a.m. working, I wake up every morning at 6:20, usually pull my hair out of a sock bun and am out the door by 6:45-6:50 to catch Trax, getting to work around 7:50.  I spend the day transcribing, mailing out said transcriptions, renewing medical licenses, and other odds and ends.  When 4:30 hits, I'm on the Trax ready to be home, but still have an hour of sitting.  I use this time to crochet (yes, I'm the crazy crochet lady on the train) or to read.  It's actually quite relaxing.
For the first 2 weeks, I couldn't possibly be grumpier.  Unused to a 40 hour work week and add 10 hours of sitting on Trax, I come home ready for bed.  Add to that the fact that Justin has been sick so I don't need much encouragement to just lie on the couch until we go to bed around 10:30 (having already took a couple of naps possibly).
My waist line is suffering!  I've decided that for the time being, you can all refer to me as "The Chunkster."

Over Thanksgiving break (yes, I got a 4-day weekend!!! Jobs where they appreciate their workers are wonderful!), I've worked out 3 times, which is ESSENTIAL to my well being.  I'm not just talking about my waistline and health, I'm talking about the crazies.

You see, I'm a worrier - and I'm very proficient at it and for SOME reason, when I don't have a place to pound out all those worries, they all seem to combine and I just being this mass of anxiety that NO ONE, not even myself wants to deal with.

So, I found a treadmill workout that I can do at the club house here at our apartment complex.  It's only 20 minutes and I think I can spare the couch, and Justin can spare 20 minutes of snuggles so that the crazy doesn't come out.

And yes, at some point I need to turn that 20 minutes into about 2 hours - cause I've got a half marathon to run... working on it!

Toodles!

New!

I added a new side thinger - you guys can now see my running progress/not progress... Haha.  Check it out and hold me to it!

Oodles of Noodles

I'm super excited!!! Only 2 more days of working at IHC and then I start my job at the University on Tuesday.  I can't wait!
I am, however, interested in seeing how this is going to effect my cooking.  I haven't had a full time job working away from home in a long time.  With working from home, sometimes I'd take my 15 minute break or a 5 minute break or whatever and use that time to throw something in the oven or in someway prepare for dinner that night.  Crockpot meals are good, but I get a little anal about not being home to check on them... so we'll see how it goes.
Got some more meatless meals for you though.

Spicy Kale Lasagna - I am a big fan of Annie's Eats.  The only problem is that a lot of her recipes are labor intensive and contain a lot of ingredients.  If you put forth the effort, it's usually worth it, but most of the time I don't want to put forth the effort.  This meal came together quick and easy and I really liked it.  Next time, I will probably make 2 pans of this and let what we don't eat cool and firm up to be wrapped in individual portions in foil and put in the freezer for quick meals or lunches later.  Justin and I got about  5 meals out of 1 pan.  Two changes, I only used 2 cups of cottage cheese because I thought that 4 was way too much.  I also used the cheese I had on hand, which was Colby.  I really don't understand how people buy so many different cheeses, they're so expensive!  It also might be nice to add some zucchini or some other vegetables in, but it was filling and good as is.

Roasted Zucchini Pasta - This was REALLY good and a big hit with Justin.  I think in the summer some added tomatoes would be nice, but besides that I wouldn't change a thing.  It makes a lot so be prepared to love your leftovers.  It tasted even better the next day!  This site has quite a few meatless meals that look rather tasty.

Spaghetti Squash with Grilled Chicken and Sun-dried Tomatoes - So I have to say... I didn't like this meal.  The only reason I'm putting it up here is because Justin LOVED it.  He said it was up there with the best things I've made... I thought the spaghetti squash was too much work, and I also didn't like the texture.  I'm going to try the same ingredients again, only with regular pasta instead and I'm sure that will work out better.  As a side note, the chicken I made to go with this was actually really good.  I'm still planning on going mostly meatless, but its nice to know I'm not as limited in my choices... for now at least.  Who knows how I'll feel tomorrow.

Look to the sidebar to see what I've got coming up.  You might see something that you'll wanna try!

For YaY!

I already changed this on Fb, so some of you know - but I thought I'd make it blogger official.  As on November 1, I will be working at the University of Utah at the John Moran Eye Center.  I'm going to be a Medical Secretary working for 2 pediatric ophthalmologists.  As a Medical Secretary, I'll be doing transcription for these 2 doctors, as well as answering phones, arranging travel plans, and other secretarial duties.
I am so excited.
In some ways I'm really sad to leave IHC.  I've made a lot of friends there.  Funny to say that I've made a lot of friends when I work from home with only my computer to talk to.  Whenever we stumble upon a word we can't understand or a word we don't know, we can IM another work-at-home transcriptionist to help us out, which usually leads to us complaining about that particular doctor and sometimes, an actual conversation - which leads to Fb friendships and etc., etc., etc.  Even in my secluded environment, I managed to find wonderful friends who love me and accept me for who I really am.  I'm REALLY hoping I won't lose this.
On the other hand, IHC as a whole is not the greatest company to work for.  Most of their staff is underpaid and overworked.  In the medical transcription department, we're paid on production.  So that means that you can work for 8 hours straight, but if it was a particularly rough day or there were technical difficulties, etc., you ate that time and money.  You have a whole slew of doctors that get frustrated at you for their own mistakes and supervisors who try to advocate for you, but their higher-ups aren't listening and the doctors... well, most people know how doctors are.
I'm also excited to wake up every day and get ready, make myself presentable for the world.  Justin and I went to Maurices and bought me a whole new professional wardrobe - and I'm going to be stylin.  I'm excited to be working with real people and interacting on a face to face basis with supervisors and bosses.  I know that this will bring its own set of problems, but I also know it will bring its own advantages.
I am ready to move on.
November 1, here I come!

Going Vegetarian... part of the way

So... I've basically become a vegetarian.  Believe me, it's a shock to me as well.  I've mentioned before that I've been having a hard time with chicken lately to the point that I can't eat it (except for whatever my brother's girlfriend, Nerissa, makes - because let's face it, she's amazing), but it seems to have gone much further than that.  Not only do I not want to eat chicken, I also don't want to eat steak.  This is a HUGE shocker - because I am (or was) a steak kind of girl.
This all started about the time that Emi and I separated.  I doubt that has anything to do with it, but due to the stress of the whole thing - I rarely ate (I remember eating 1 piece of bread, and that was it, for a whole day) and for about 6 months had next to no appetite.  I remember heading to Applebees with a friend and I got my favorite thing there, the Ribeye steak with shrimp and Parmesan on top.  I took a couple of bites and was on the verge of being sick.  Not because there was anything wrong with it or that it wasn't of the usual high quality that I like - I just didn't want the meat.  The same thing happened when I made Justin and I some salmon earlier this year.  I'm tolerating ground beef more than anything - and have had some success with steak and pork in a stir fry (with lots of vegetables and rice).  So, when I was planning out our meals I told Justin that I thought I was going vegetarian.  Luckily, he agreed.  He said that it would probably be better for our diets to treat meat as a luxury instead of a staple.
The other added bonus to this is the price tag.  I keep a very stocked pantry so unless you do, you can't really quote me on this, but for 2 weeks worth of meals I spent $25.  The next time I spent $35, but I did buy some sausage and some sun-dried tomatoes and I planned an extra meal than normal.  That is $60 on a months worth of food for 2 people.

Anyway, to my point:  Here are some vegetarian meals that I've already made and had success with.

Super Bean Burritos - This recipe made 16 burritos and we still have about 9 of them in the freezer.  Justin has been taking them for lunch and we've had them for a quick meal as well.  Not to mention, I really like the way they taste.  Only one change, I switched out the beans for kidney beans as those are Justin's favorite and what we have stocked in the pantry from Costco.

Tomato Bisque Soup - This was my first experience with Butternut Squash and I'm hooked.  My first taste of this really hit the spot.  This is restaurant quality stuff.  You. Must. Try.  The only thing I did differently is that I didn't want to spend the money on half and half (I'm that cheap!) because I had 2 oz of cream cheese in my fridge that needed a home.  So I let that soften, cut it up into chunks, and stirred it in with some milk.  I served this with a grilled cheese sandwich for dipping and some whole wheat Saltines.  Delicious.

White Bean and Sausage Ragout - This is my "part of the way."  You hardly even noticed the sausage in this dish because it was so full of beans, tomatoes, zucchini, and kale.  A ragout is comparable to a stew for those who don't know (I certainly didn't...) and it was really good.  The zucchini was Justin's favorite part.  If you wanted to go vegetarian, you could probably replace the sausage with tofu or leave it out entirely since you've got beans for a source of protein and fiber.

Here's what I've got coming up next:
Roasted Zucchini Pasta
Spicy Kale Lasagna
Spaghetti Squash with Grilled Chicken and Sun-dried Tomatoes (another halfway and attempt at me liking chicken)

Obviously, I'll need to do some more research on going vegetarian to ensure that we're still getting the nutrients that we need that we'll be missing out on from the meat, but so far my belly is full and my taste buds are happy.

1 year

A year ago today, Justin and I went on our first date and 3 days later, we decided to be exclusive so October 10 is our official anniversary.

Techinically, I met Justin at a party down in Utah Valley sometime in September 2010 with the group of atheists/struggling Mormons/etc.  I remember walking in the kitchen to get a drink and Justin was standing on the other side of the counter.  He looked right at me and I smiled, but he didn't respond so I imagine he must have been thinking about something.  I thought he was gorgeous and to this day, still think that Justin is the most attractive man I've ever met in real life.  He was WAY out of my league.  I was also at the party with another boy so I didn't actually talk to him.
About 2 weeks later, I had told the other boy I wasn't interested and had decided that I was done dating for awhile having dated 4 boys in the last 2 months, 3 of which belonged to this group.  The beginning of October, Justin, having a lot of mutual friends with me, added me on facebook.  We had a brief conversation one night, but I didn't think much of it.  A couple of days later, I got a message from him asking me if I wanted to hang out that night.  I was training for a 10k and going running with my dad so I asked for a rain check and he asked for my number. 
The next day, October 7, he sent me a text asking me if I was going to be running that night too.  I said no and he told me he'd come up to Salt Lake to pick me up.  I was pretty nervous since I'd never ACTUALLY talked to him in person, but I was really excited too.  That night, he came and picked me up and couldn't find my brother's condo.  I walked out front to where he was and he walked towards me and gave me a hug.  He was wearing this black argyle sweater and his glasses.  He was adorable.
We went downtown to the gateway, did a little shopping/looking around, ate dinner at Edo Japan (my choice! yum!), and then went and saw the movie Easy A.  Afterwards, we went to Murray Park, walked around and talked until we eventually got kicked out by the police for being in the park after 10:00.  I REALLY liked him.  He drove me home and told me he'd text me the next day.
The next day Justin texted me as promised and I was having a pretty busy morning.  My brother's friends were getting married and he had forgotten something at home so I had to run down to Salt Lake to give it to him and to be honest, I didn't want to appear too eager.  Eventually, I got a 2nd text from him saying something like, "Amy, I'm going to kick your butt.  Answer me!"  Haha - so I replied back that it had been a busy morning, but that I was wondering if he wanted to get together again that night.  I went down to Orem to see him and we watched a movie.  I had my 10k the next day so it was pretty silly of me to go down there that night, but I did and I'm SO glad I did.  He kissed me - and it was a really good night.
The next morning when I got to Thanksgiving Point for my 10k, I had a text on my phone from Justin that say, "Try not to die, I'm getting rather fond of you."  Haha.
On Sunday, we decided to go hiking to Stewart Falls and on the way up there we had a DTR.  We both weren't necessarily looking for a serious relationship, but neither one of us wanted the other person to be seeing other people.  Kind of a funny situation, but it appeared that both of us were hooked.  We ended up skipping on Stewart Falls because it was too cold and just headed back to Justin's place.  A couple of days later we did end up going to Stewart Falls and Justin made me climb all over the place.  It was pretty scary, but he was impressed with how I handled the whole thing.  While we were up there on the falls, he told me that he was falling in love with me.  It all happened very fast and I didn't say it back at the time.  It took me about 2 more weeks to let him know how I was feeling.

And now, here we are a year later.  It seems like this happened yesterday, but it also feels like a lifetime away.
I pretty much love that boy.

Recipe Review - White Bean and Tuna Salad

So I decided I'm gonna do recipe reviews from time to time to share with you all.  I'll only share with you the ones I like and just give you a quick link over and let you know if I made any changes.  You'll find over on the right hand side what's on my menu.  I might have a couple within the next week or so, but I promise that there will be a good mix of my life in here.  

Justin and I have been trying to eat healthier so we've done some switching over to different foods.  Whole wheat pasta instead of the regular kind, adding beans to our diet (I'm not a fan of the texture), eating more vegetables (still working on fruits - don't like the texture), and eliminating things.  Also, I've decided in the last couple of months that I don't like chicken, so we haven't been eating very much of that lately either and going meatless more often.  I've also been having a hard time with cream.  I've been refusing to cook with any "cream of" anything for about the past year, but I'm kind of starting to feel similarly with anything that has heavy cream or cream cheese in it.  I'm feeling ok with half and half, but the sauce doesn't turn out quite the same, so my options are pretty limited  (I'm PRETTY excited about trying the avocado pasta I have listed over on the right.).

Also, I've recently gotten really interested in freezer meals.  Justin and I are very serious about getting back into school in the Spring (We've both been studying for the placement tests to ensure accurate placement, so that's PRETTY serious.) and it's unlikely we'll be home at the same time very often and even more unlikely that either one of us will have time to cook.  I don't want us to waste money eating out and I also don't want us to eat unhealthy preservative-stuffed TV dinners, so I've been trying to figure out what to do.  Check out this site for an idea on what i'm talking about.  I'll update you more when I have a better idea of how to go about it, but I'm going to be buying the book, 'Don't Panic, Dinner's in the Freezer' soon.

Anyway - to the recipe!  Go here if you're interested!

This was a GOOOD and a very light dinner.  Tuna fish has some amazing health benefits and white beans are low-fat and high in fiber - making this an altogether healthy meal.  I served the salad on croissants, but there are many other ways you can serve it.  The flavor was fantastic (even having served it right away) and I'm sure it will be even better tomorrow.  The idea for this meal was dinner tonight and then lunch for Justin and I for the week.  Let me tell you, I'm counting down the hours until lunch tomorrow.

Thanks for tuning in!

Face-everything you don't want to know-book

Lately, I've had a really hard time updating my Facebook status.  It's not that I don't have a lot to say.  It's just that everything I DO have to say isn't so important.  So instead of unleashing myself on the masses, you are going to be the tortured few to what I had to say today...

Stir fry is my favorite thing to make lately. It is so versatile.  You can use steak, chicken, pork.  Mix up the vegetables (I've just been buying frozen vegetable medleys).  Mix up the sauce... I had some sesame and garlic sauce that was really good and just recently bought some actual stir fry sauce that is even better, but I'm sure I'll continue to explore.

When I served Justin up his food today, he said - this is really good babe.  I told him thanks and apologized that I had been making it so much lately... He wasn't even aware that we had been eating it a lot lately.  See:  Stir fry = complete genius.

Phew - glad I got that out there.

Inspiration

So... inspired by my friend Shayla, I've decided to get serious wit cha all and tell you about some fitness goals I've got going on up in here - and I hope you'll hold me to it.
I'm a relatively skinny girl, but I'm not a relatively tone girl and I really want to do something about it.  So basically the main problem areas I'm working on are my triceps, my inner thighs, my lower abdomen, and of course those damn love handles.
I've posted a couple of videos on the sidebar that are the workouts that I'm doing in circuits (25 reps each, repeated 4 times).  The arm ones are a huge struggle for me as I've never had a lot of upper body strength, but we're here to change that!
Right now, my routine consists of 30 minutes on either the stair climber, elliptical, or treadmill and then 4 sets of back arches and side bends (Don't know what else to call them).
Following that, I do the exercises from the video.
So the frustration?  It's obvious that I'm getting smaller and more toned - inchwise, but my weight is staying at a number that I just consider awful (for me).  I know I'm building muscle and muscle weighs more than fat, but COME ON I want to see a better number.  :-D
The next fitness goal would be a half marathon.  I just discussed this the other day with my brother's girlfriend, Nerissa.  I'm really hoping this happens because I've had this goal in mind for over a year and haven't done anything about it.  I've got a ways to go because I've only ran at most a 10k and since I've been focusing more on a core training, I'm not even sure I'd have the endurance to run a 5k right now, especially not at a respectable pace.

So there you have it.  I'm gonna...

• Tone those triceps
• Beat those love handles into submission
• Get rid of the gut
• Lose the thunder thighs ... and
• Run a half marathon

Wish me luck!

I ned too go beck to scul.

It's time to get serious people.  I need to go back to school, but where do I begin?  Is it better to just go ahead and apply for SLCC online or should I get my butt over there to talk to someone and get all the info I need?  I'm a little lost when it comes to this because getting into UVSC happened magically (Where are my parents when I need them, eh?).
I still don't know what to go to school for.  I want a job where I can be social, but will have some flexibility - maybe a potential of going part time at some point.
I don't want to just go to school and take class after class with no direction.  I need an idea of where I'm going to have the motivation (mainly to get through math classes!).
Any ideas?

Life in Mehico!!!

Hello everyone!  I'm back from Mexico!  Actually, I got back on Sunday night, but have been too exhausted to do much of anything the past couple of days.  The cruise was awesome, Mexico was awesome, my boy was awesome - it was a good time!
It was a 7 day cruise and we went to 2 ports.  You're supposed to go to 3, but apparently Mazatlan is too crazy at the moment so we spent 2 days in Cabo San Lucas.  It would have been much funner to spend 2 days in Porta Vallerta, but eh, whatever.
On the ship, we spent most of our time sitting in the sun or eating - and eating a lot.  I got a little burnt the first day we stayed out in the sun, which made the next day kind of miserable, but it all worked out.  We weren't big fans of the cruise line and probably won't ever go on a Carnival Cruise again (but it was still an enjoyable experience!)  Justin got me a spa package on Friday and I enjoyed getting my feet rubbed, my hands massaged, a deep conditioning hair treatment, a neck and back rub, and a mini facial.  All cool things, but with the facial I slightly felt like I was suffocating and had to really work to calm myself down.
In Cabo, the first day we walked around for awhile (much to mine and Justin's annoyance.  It was hot and humid and we needed water, and actually wanted to do an activity rather than just walk around for hours) and then finally rented a water taxi and went to a beach called Lover's Beach.  I had a slight mishap when getting off the taxi and ended up being temporarily swallowed up in the ocean.  :-D On the otherside of that beach, there was a beach called Divorce Beach because the waves are so strong that lots of people have died there.  Of course we had to spend some time playing in THOSE waves, but didn't go very far in.  The other girl that went, Crystal and I spend time drawing our boy's names in the sand.  Before going back to the cruise we asked a local to lead us to the best tacos and enjoyed that and some Mexican Fanta.
The next day in Cabo, Justin and I decided to ditch the rest of our group and went horseback riding.  We drove out into the middle of nowhere and trudged through a desert until we rode along a beach on some stubborn horses.  Then we had some authentic cheese quesadillas and some awesome pico de gallo before heading back to the cruise ship.
The following day we got to Porta Vallerta and it was green and beautiful, but the driving was scary!  They had the smallest lines for cars and these people had no fear of hitting each other.  We met a man named Helio or Elliot (his American name!) and purchased some fun up in the canopies of Porta Vallerta.  First, we went ATVing down to a waterfall where of course we jumped off of it into a pool.  All of the girls down there were scared, but I didn't even hesitate as I leaped off.  Thanks goes to my bro :-D  We rode the ATVs backup to the main area and then went ziplining.  This was amazing!  We were so high up and some of the ziplines were really long.  It was a lot of fun and all I could think was that my dad would kill me if he saw me. On the last zipline, we rode it upside down with our feet hanging onto the handles (harnessed in of course) and they dipped us into the river.  It was a lot of fun.  Getting off, we rode mules back up to the main area and then headed back to the city for some Mexican seafood before taking off to the ship.
We had 2 formal nights where I wore my red dress - and on the first one I got a little bit seasick and ended up throwing up right outside the dining room (their fault for not marking their bathrooms better!).  Pretty funny in retrospection, but I was awfully embarrassed when it happened.
That pretty much sums up the cruise.  It was a lot of fun and I loved spending so much time with my boy.  Without all the outside influences of the world, it was really easy to see how good of a relationship we have.  Coming back home leads back into a busier life that seems a lot more scary, but at least I know I've got that base.
I'll be posting pictures on fb soon.  We didn't take a lot, but we have some from Justin's friends that went with us as well.

Why I Hate WAHMs

WAHM = Work at home moms.

This is probably a strange title for a post, especially where most of my readers are young mothers that may or may not be working, but I don't think this applies to any of you.

So the plight of a mother... I guess I don't know much about because I've never been one, but I can imagine that you want to take care of your children, still be social, and still look really cute - and having the money to do all of this stuff can be tough.  I get that.  Really its not that different than being a married girl - no kids or a single girl.  More money is always good.

So enter in the myriad of jobs that can allow you to be a mom, be super cool, sociable, and bring in that extra dime to help out for whatever.  We've got Scentsy, Pampered Chef, Melaleuca, Mary Kay, Lia Sophia, Usborne Books, etc, etc, and for the more daring, Slumber Parties - anything you want to buy pretty much, you can get from a WAHM.

Wonderful.

The problem?  The problem is being constantly harassed by your friends to buy products whether to get them some free wickless candles, makeup, jewelry, etc, or if they're an actual consultant (oh dear...) to get them that watch they so desperately wanted to get their husband for his birthday/christmas/gee, honey you deserve a watch day - or more importantly to feed, clothe, or in other words take care of their children.  I get that you have kids and I get that you need to make a living just like everyone else does and not everyone is so fortunate that their husband can provide everything, but I need to eat, I need clothes, and yes, I need entertainment too.  I'm busy - I don't have time or the amount of girlfriends (and maybe this is why!) to do a party for you where I'm going to end up having to spend at least $50 or more on your products even with your (not so great) GREAT PARTY DISCOUNTS.

You're starting a new WAHM mom business, sure - tell me about it.  Ask me if I want to host a party.  Ask me if I want any products from time to time - If I tell you I don't have friends that would be interested, don't ask me to host a party again.  If I tell you that I do want products, but don't have money - let me come to you.  A friendly reminder is friendly, but it becomes less friendly when I'm getting fb messages, texts, and emails from you on a weekly basis.

and one more word of advice... guilt trips do not help.  If your children are in need of food or clothing and you're that desperate, I'll give you some money if I have it, but don't tell me that if I would only order $50 worth of stuff then your life would be golden.  We're supposed to be friends so don't take advantage of our friendship by guilt tripping me into helping you get to that next level.  I'd love to help you - and if I have the money to do it and need/want products - I'll be your most loyal customer.

At this point in my life I had so many bad experiences with almost every WAHM industry out there that the moment I hear party or boutique my head starts thumping and I'm looking for the first thing I can hit without hurting anyone.

And really, if you can't feed or clothe your children, I think its time you tried to get a normal job.

Admittedly, I had a moment of insanity a couple of years ago where I had my own Mary Kay party and even tried to become a Mary Kay consultant where they teach you to guilt trip your friends and family into "helping you out," but it was short lived because I'm not the type of person that can sell you something that you don't need and could get cheaper elsewhere, and sure - I'd take your money for a product or a service, but in no way would I force/harass/strangle the life out of you in order to meet that end.

Now... END RANT - and I love you all.

We be eatin' everying in a quesadilla...

As most of you know, I used to have a food blog.  I'm not planning on starting that up again as of right now because food isn't as big of a deal in my life now as it used to be, but I figured I could put my adventures up here from time to time. 

So last week I made some Roast Chicken with Rosemary and Lemon, which is a recipe that I found and tweaked about 2-1/2 years ago.  I love it, because I hate potatoes - and this dish makes me actually like potatoes.  I'm planning on tweaking it a bit and making more of a marinade so that I can grill the chicken for summer because the flavor is fantastic.  I was pretty annoyed the whole time my apartment was heating up with the oven and have declared I won't use it again until it's cold.  Anyway - I ran out of chicken stock and Justin had some beer in the fridge so I used that instead (The alcohol cooks out, fyi!).  Personally, it tastes better with the chicken stock (in this recipe) but the Beer Butt Chicken I had a few years ago was really good.

Anyway - I used the leftover chicken in a pasta dish (typical alfredo pasta) and also in a quesadilla with Mexican rice.  Now, since I'm the queen of leftovers (Shocker for anyone that grew up with me.  I used to hate leftovers!) I took the leftover Mexican rice, added some kidney beans (another shocker!) and we had that the following day.  Pretty decent, if I do say so myself.  Yesterday, we got some fried chicken from the deli at Dan's and we had Fried Chicken Quesadilla and considered ourselves very American.

But now the thing I'm really excited about...
I came across this recipe on Shayla's site and while I loved the idea and it was very good her way, I made a few changes - and even added shrimp that I declawed, deshelled, and cooked myself! (What a PAIN!)

Sweet Red Bell Pepper and Cayenne Whole Wheat Spaghetti
12 ounces dry whole wheat spaghetti
2 red bell peppers, julienned
3 cloves garlic, minced
1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper
1 cup heavy cream
3/4 cup grated Parmesan cheese
Salt and pepper to taste
About a pound of brown shrimp, deshelled and deveined (Optional - you could also use chicken or go meatless like the original recipe)
Olive oil

Bring a large pot of lightly salted water to a boil. Add pasta and cook for 8 to 10 minutes or until al dente; drain.
Meanwhile, in a large skillet saute shrimp until done.  Set aside.  In the same pan, saute red bell peppers and cayenne pepper over medium heat for 3 to 5 minutes.  About halfway in, add the garlic and sautee.
Stir in heavy cream and parmesan cheese, stirring until thickened.  Add in shrimp.
Toss hot pasta with sauce and shrimp and season with salt and pepper to taste; serve.

It was divine! and honestly all I've been thinking about since I first made Shayla's recipe two weeks or so ago.  I doubt I'll bother with the shrimp again because I don't like the frozen stuff and the fresh stuff took too long to do anything with (and my hands smelled fishy ALL night), but apparently you can buy uncooked, deveined, deshelled shrimp as well, so maybe one day I'll do that again.  So good!

Anyway - 4 more days of work and then continous party for 2-1/2 weeks.  CANNOT wait!  I'm hoping to have pictures - so I'll keep you guys in the loop!

Btw, I got my dress and shoes for the cruise yesterday - and I just might kill myself in those 5-1/2 inch heels.  I've been walking around the house in them and have gotten better, but we will see.  Wish me luck!

Oh... the joy.

I'm tired of being a girl... but I don't really want to be a boy either.

I woke up this morning at 2 a.m. for work and I felt soooooo sick and I knew it was because of the slew of hormones going on in this body of mine.  I am done with it, THROUGH!

Who's with me?

I believe I can fly...

So I got back from Flaming Gorge on Saturday night, took about a day to recover and now for the report. I unfortunately forgot my camera, so there are no pictures, but we do have one video, soooo... I'll either post that here or on fb for all of y'all's enjoyment.

The trip was mostly uneventful. The water was pretty high so I didn't really feel the stinging slap of the water like last year. I do have a small bruise on the back of my leg from a slightly blotched landing, but nothing like the knee to bum bruise I had last year from going in slightly sideways... :-D I jumped off the 3rd to highest cliff this year, and it only took me about a minute (once standing up there) to get the courage to do so.

Justin, however, decided to be crazy like my big bro and jump of the "Big Dog" It's got to be at least 30 feet or so. I had never seen my brother jump off this cliff before so I was pretty nervous, but he did it and landed perfectly. After about 5 minutes, Justin decided that he wanted to jump too. Eric was really excited because no one else has ever taken this jump besides him. I was a nervous wreck. I knew Eric had done it before so while I was nervous, I was confident that he could do it. Justin on the other hand... I was terrified. I kept telling him not to do it, but could tell he really wanted to. Finally, I said - if you want to do it, I'm not going to stop you. He said - Well I'm not feeling very much support. I want you to say you want me to do it. And so... I said - Okay, fine. I want you to do it. (Very sarcastically) So Justin went over there with Eric and his friend Leon behind him (ready to jump in in case anything went wrong...) and after about 2 excruciating minutes he jumped. He thought he had more time to get his balance, but quickly hit the water with his arms spread and resounding thwack! He got up and we were all yelling at him asking if he was ok and he wasn't responding. I was almost in tears even though he was obviously moving around... and didn't calm down until I heard him say that his hands were tingling. He climbed up the cliffs and I got a very wet hug, but was still full of nervous energy for the next 15-20 minutes... maybe it will be better next year...

Important note, I did wear my new bikini from Victoria Secret and am happy to report no wardrobe malfunctions. Justin had convinced to wear it and I was a little nervous with the jumping off the cliffs and everything and although I checked myself every time before I popped out of the water, everything went smoothly! ;-)

So that about sums it up and we're all vacationed out until August 8, when we leave to go down to St. George/Arizona to go hike the narrows, see Justin's brother, and then head out to Long Beach where we'll get on a Carnival Cruise Ship and head to Mehico!!! I'll be off work for 2-1/2 weeks and I can hardly wait.

One last thing, quick shout out to a good friend who went out of her way to make me feel accepted after writing my last post. It isn't exactly easy to go against the norm and I appreciate your love and support. You've always been a great friend and I love you so much!! I need to come play with you and your boys soon.

Understanding

So, I mostly want this blog to be lighthearted and fun, but recently people have been asking me a lot of questions so I thought I'd just write it all out and if there is anything else you'd like to know, we can talk about it some more. What I'm about to write will be a touchy subject for some of you, but for the people that I know read this blog, I'm sure you can handle it because we've been through a lot - thick and thin.
So one of first things that people ask me when I tell them about my boyfriend, is whether or not he is LDS. He's not. You may have noticed from his facebook profile that he has a tattoo. He has 2 actually - and they're both very symbolic to him and actually have some really cool meanings. So yes, Justin is not LDS. In fact, he was LDS and had his name removed from the church. Justin served an honorable mission to New Caledonia (near Fiji) and about a month after getting home from his mission, he decided he was an atheist - and yes, Justin really, truly, honestly believes that there is no God and I can assure you that Justin is a good, happy person who treats me well and makes me incredibly happy.
So once that is all out in the open, the conversation generally turns to what I believe, being as I am with an ExMormon Atheist and whether I am ok with what Justin believes. (Although, we don't like labels - exmormon, atheist, agnostic, etc)
So here is the story... some of you may know part of this and some of you may not. When I was about 14-years-old, something very tragic happened in my homeward. I remember before sacrament meeting everyone was moving around and whispering and it was very apparent that SOMETHING was going on. I had no clue what it was, but right there in the midst of everything... this little thought popped into my mind. "They are going to announce the church isn't true." I don't know why I thought that, but I did and from there it only grew. I lived out my middle school and high school years as a very active LDS member, being Laurel president, on the youth counsel committee, and even got pulled out of young women's because the primary president liked me so much and asked me to teach sunbeams. I did all these things with an honest heart, but I still had this lingering thought in my head that all of this just didn't make sense to me, didn't click.
Once I went to college and felt free of my obligation to my ward and my parents, I stopped going to church. I still hadn't given up on it, but I was happier without it. Happier without all the pressure to look perfectly dressed every Sunday (which is only worse in college wards because you're competing for husbands...), happier to have more time to relax, do homework, run errands on Sundays, but there was still something missing for me. I met Emi - and we got married. The original plan was to be married for a year and then be sealed in the temple and while I wanting this, I also knew that I didn't want it. It didn't feel like me. I knew it wasn't authentic because I knew I was happier without the church.
Once mine and Emi's relationship fell apart, (Some of you know the details, some don't. I am more open to talking about it now if you'd like.)I started going to church with my parents. I went a total of 3 times in my home ward. There was a moment in my Gospel Doctrine class that everything clicked and everything made sense and I knew that I wasn't supposed to be there. I still wasn't quite sure where I was supposed to be though.
I attended another church (different religion) very briefly and while I appreciated their renewed and outspoken zest for God, I still didn't quite feel like I fit it - like what I was doing made sense to me.
There was a period of about 3 months where I stopped going to church completely, and I went hiking every Sunday with my brother. Out there is the treetops of Utah, I found happiness. I found peace. I felt like this is where I was supposed to be. In July, I met up with some similarly minded people and my ideas grew and developed and as my ideas were ever changing, and doubting was ok, dissonance was ok, I became a lot happier.
In October, I met Justin. Since then, we have decided that the group of people we were hanging out with really isn't working for us. There is too much of a focus on religion (or a decided lack thereof) and Justin and I would rather live our lives without it so basically, I've decided that if you want to label me, you can label me as nonreligious and just leave it at that.
I want to make it clear that I am not suggesting this to you or to anyone. I'm merely writing about my experience and the conclusions that I have come to. I respect anyone's decision to remain religious or to do away with it and if you'd like to talk about either way, I'm open to discussion.
I didn't leave the church because I was offended. I didn't leave it because I wanted to do bad things. I didn't leave because the devil was whispering in my ear. I didn't leave because of my divorce, I am not angry at God. And last of all, Justin (or anyone else) didn't convince me to leave. I left because it was what was best for me. I am happier, more motivated, and more confident than I can ever remember being in my life.
This is just a skim of what's going on in my mind and like I said, I am more than willing to discuss it with anyone. All that I ask is for you to leave the stereotypes behind and remember that I'm still Amy, I'm still a good person, and I still love and respect each and every one of you.

(Also, while my parents know about all of these decisions, I ask that you don't bring it up to them if the opportunity arises because it is still a hard thing for them and out of respect for me, I ask that you don't gossip about and bring more pain for them.)

2 a.m. and she calls me, cause I'm still awake.

Quick update at 2:00 in the morning - and no, I'm not still awake, just woke up for work.

Lots of random thoughts going through my head right now so I'm just going to jot them down for the enjoyment of everyone else.

I realized that I hate doing dishes, but I'll probably do mounds of them for the rest of my life, unless I get rich enough to get a maid. I should really put that on my *need* list.

I think everyone should have to be awake at 2 a.m. when I am. I keep looking at my phone expecting a text message, but then realize that most people are probably sleeping (or half sleeping while feeding their babies!!).

I'm a pretty lucky girl. My boyfriend made me dinner last night. Italian Tortelli Soup. He's hilarious though, he added some white wine - which was good, but he also added some pomegranate mixer so it had this weird fruity taste to it. Last time he made dinner, he made sloppy joes and added some Peach Mango V8 juice - what to do with him? Sometimes I think he does this so I'll stop asking him to make dinner, but at least there is always a surprise!

It is still very unsettling to see anyone in the kitchen but me and it takes great amounts of control to stop myself from going in and making sure he is doing everything right (and by that, I mean exactly the way I would do it!).

I have been excessively tired for the last 6 months or so. Orginally I thought it was because it was always so dark in the winter, making me tired, but it continued into the Spring and now Summer. It might be my weird work schedule, but I also think maybe I'm low on Iron or Vitamin B. I read online that Licorice root is good for excessive tiredness - so I'm headed to get some in the morn. Let me know if you have any other suggestions.

I've pretty much given up on wearing makeup for the summer.

Last night, I made a raspberry cobbler and I barely followed the recipe. It turned out great.

I find it interesting that the things that I was so crazy OCD about before (recipes, the part in my hair, cleaning, tracing the alphabet with my finger, etc) have all gotten much better now that my life is so calm and (emotionally) decluttered. It helps that I'm in a good relationship with someone I can really talk to. I've still got a ways to go as far as calming myself down, but I've come a long way.

and lastly, girls from middle school that you haven't talked to since that enjoy spreading rumors about you are lame. LAME!!!! Sorry girlfriend, but you know absolutely nothing about my life and you obviously need to get one.
Okay - passive agressive moment over.

Until next time!

An uPdAtE...

Hello everyone!!! I figured that it was long past time that I updated all of you on my life! Justin and I have been together for 9 months now and things are going really well. So well, in fact, that we moved in together a couple of months ago. I know that that is kind of different in Utah culture, but it's the choice that we made and I'm really happy. :-)
We are headed out on a cruise next month to Mehico. We'll leave Long Beach, CA and go to Cabo San Lucas and Porta Vallerta. We're going with some of Justin's friends from high school, a group that he refers to as "The Phamily." It should be a lot of fun. To save on costs, we got a room with two of his friends, Devin and Trent - so yes, I will be in a room with 3 boys... Haha. We're looking at possibly doing a zip line or maybe some horseback riding and spending lots of time on the beach. I've been working on my tan in an effort to not be the whitest girl in Mexico, but I probably still will be.
Things are going pretty well with my job, although after all that hard work of finding something so that I can work from home, I've decided that I'm not the homeworking type. I would like to find a job in a hospital or a doctor's office, although I'm also thinking about going back to school. The only problem is... I still at 24-years-old have NO idea what I want to do. Hopefully I'll get an epiphany in the next couple of months.
In about 8 days, we're headed out to Flaming Gorge again with my brother. I couldn't be more excited about throwing myself off a couple of cliffs. We just bought this bright orange cooler and it is pretty much the cutest cooler I've ever seen.
Justin's nephew was born about a week ago. Baby Rushton. He is adorable and it will be fun to see him around from here on out. Luckily, I seemed to have cured myself of the baby hunger I was experiencing a few years ago, and I figure I can wait a while... like 5 years. :-D
I've been taking a couple of fitness classes at Gold's Gym, and that has been really good for me. I really like Zumba, but recently went retro and took a step aerobics class and actually enjoyed that quite a bit as well. One of these days I'll get around to trying the hip hop class, but for now I'm quite happy.
I have done next to no hiking so far this summer, but that needs to be remedied soon. I went with my friend Rachel from Tasty Marble to Grandeur Peak a couple of weeks ago and it gave me the fever so hopefully it'll pick up soon.
So I think that is pretty much it for now - I'll try to update this thing more often, but really day to day life is not that exciting, but it is good.

2010 Survey... Blast from the past!

I used to fill out these surveys all the time when I was younger and I was feeling nostalgic, so I decided to do one today. Enjoy - and steal if you want!

1. What did you do in 2010 that you'd never done before?
Got divorced, cliff jumping, 13.5 hour road trip, went up in a small plane, mountain biking, and a lot of trying new things.

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I don't think I had a New Years' resolution... my life at that time was just one day at a time - there was no way I could make a resolution for a whole year. No resolutions, but I've got some goals in mind.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Yes! - I live in freakin' Utah.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
No.

5. What countries did you visit?
The good ol' US of A.

6. What would you like to have in 2011 that you lacked in 2010?
This last year has been amazing - I've done a lot of growing and changing, so the only thing I can ask for is that the progress doesn't stop.

7. What dates from 2010 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
July 8 - Divorce was final. October 10 - Mine and Justin's anniversary!

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Finally being able to stand up to a lot of my own personal demons, having the confidence that who I am is more than just acceptable, the realization that I can be my own hero.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Nothing in my life has been a failure - just a lot of learning.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I got a wicked awesome bruise from cliff jumping.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
My Ipod Shuffle and the Christina Perri Ocean Way Sessions.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Too many people to name. I am a very lucky girl to have the friends and family that I do. My support system is astounding - but especially my brother Eric.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Haha, I think we all know the answer to that.

14. Where did most of your money go?
To fun. When was the last time anyone could say that?

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Cliff Jumping, hiking, and mountain biking.

16. What song will always remind you of 2010?
I Need You Now - Lady Antebellum

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder?
Happier would be an understatement.
b) richer or poorer?
Richer.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
More hard work.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Worrying.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
I spent Christmas all over Utah and Salt Lake Counties. Christmas Eve - Dinner at my parent's, party at Justin's friend's Chase's parent's house, slept over at Justin's mom's house. Christmas Day - Breakfast at Justin's mom's, Dinner at my parent's, and after dinner and white elephant gift exchange at Justin's Dad's.

21. Did you fall in love in 2010?
In and out. Phew, what a year.

22. How many ...one night stands?
None.

23. What was your favorite TV program?
Modern Family.

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
No one living.

25. What was the best book you read?
Pride and Prejudice

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Christina Perri

27. What did you want and get?
Confidence.

28. What did you want and not get?
Understanding.

29. What was your favorite film of this year?
Love and Other Drugs

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
Went out to dinner with Eric and Justin. The next day Justin took me to Park City. I turned 24.

31.What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Less worrying.

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2004?
I'm a t-shirt and jeans kind of girl, but I did get some skinny jeans and some awesome plaid shorts. I also bought some shorts with a 5 inch inseam! GASP!

33. What kept you sane?
Running.

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
What does fancy mean? Christina Perri.

35. What political issue stirred you the most?
Gay Rights.

36. Who did you miss?
This is a tough question - I think the term "I miss..." would pretty much sum up most of my year.

37. Who was the best new person you met in 2010?
Justin, Geneva, and Tyler.

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2010:
Be yourself no matter the consequences.

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
"But I have grown too strong to ever fall back in your arms"