On her due date, October 30, I had a few people predicting that she was going to come on Halloween. I really did not want her to come that day for a few reasons. I really wanted to be able to take Cora trick-or-treating. I also didn't want her birthday to be on Halloween and have it be overshadowed for the rest of her life. I said that I was hoping she'd stay put until at least the 1st.
Halloween was a very busy, active day with Montessori Halloween parties, trick-or-treating at Justin's work, a visit to South Town Mall with a train ride, and more trick-or-treating around our neighborhood. I had several neighbors ask me when that baby was supposed to come and what I was gonna do to get her out. One guy said, "She's gonna walk around all night trick-or-treating until she goes into labor." Cora tired of trick-or-treating pretty quickly so we headed home to chili and cornbread and put her to bed around 8 p.m., leaving our candy dish outside to the mercy of the neighborhood teenagers. I was texting a few of my friends and wrote this exact phrase, "At 12:01, I'm kicking her out." I headed to bed around 10 p.m.
At some point, I woke up needing to go to the bathroom and when I got there, I noticed a gush of fluid that definitely wasn't pee followed quickly by a contraction. I headed back to the bed and grabbed my phone. It was 12:07 a.m. I wrote my doula, Meagan, and said "You aren't going to believe this... Just woke up and went to the bathroom. I don't know if my water broke, but I had a gush of blood-tinged fluid." I sat there on the floor next to the bed laughing like crazy because she definitely had taken my threat of kicking her out seriously. Throughout the first two stages of labor, I continued to laugh off and on about that. Meagan said she woke her husband up because she was giggling about it and had to leave their room.
Leading up to Sedona's birth, I did a lot of yoga and exercises aimed at getting her in a good position to come out. Cora's labor was very difficult because she was posterior and I was determined to not experience back labor this time around. Sedona was in a better position than Cora was, called ROA (right occiput anterior), but there was still a possibility she could turn posterior. I don't believe she ever did, but I still experienced most, if not all, of the labor in my back. It wasn't the same back tearing in half labor that I had with Cora, though.
I called my mom to come to our house since she'd be staying with Cora there while we were in the hospital. I continued working through contractions and double-checking the hospital bag. Justin applied counter pressure and used a makeshift "rebozo" on me since I was experiencing back labor. All this time, I'm texting Meagan. This had been going on for awhile with contractions every 3-4 minutes and Justin started getting really nervous. They had told us that we should head to the hospital at that point once they had continued for an hour. We were further away from the hospital this time and I think he really didn't want to have the baby come in the car. I wasn't nervous at all and was in no rush to leave for the hospital, but on his suggestion, I told Meagan that we were heading out.
Once in the car, I told Justin not to speed because it would make me anxious and I knew we had time to get there. Out on 146th south, I saw something in the road, but couldn't quite make it out and just said to Justin, "There is something in the road." He slowed down as we approached and we noticed a deer lying in the middle and another on the side of the road. They both were kind enough to move out of the way and we hit the freeway. Once on the freeway, I realized I didn't know where my phone was so we turned back around to the house, managing to get behind a dump truck working construction going roughly 2 mph and I'm breathing through a contraction. Justin was so frustrated. We got home and Justin headed in only for me to find my phone had fallen underneath my seat in the car. We headed back out.
We got to the hospital around 3 in the morning and met up with Meagan. I was very calm and could tell that things had slowed down a little, but there we were. We walked up to triage and proceeded to wait forever for anything to be done. Finally, they came in to check if my water had broken or not to find out that it had and that there was meconium in it, once again risking me out of trying for a waterbirth according to the University's guidelines. They did an ultrasound to check baby's position, put her on the monitor, took some labs, but otherwise mostly left me alone. Once they were sure that it was my water, they went ahead and admitted me to labor and delivery. I should mention that my water never actually fully broke, it just kept gushing out at odd times, sometimes during a contraction, sometimes not.
I walked over to labor and delivery and baby was hooked up to continuous monitoring since there was meconium and they needed to check to make sure she wasn't in distress. Justin wasn't feeling well and was very tired so Meagan and I convinced him to lie down and take a nap while things were still pretty calm. The midwives on call came in to talk with me. They asked me if I was wanting to be checked and I said that I was because I wanted to see where I was at. Because of circumstances with my previous labor, I was hoping to avoid having to get an IV. I received an IV with Cora because I was GBS positive and needed antibiotics during labor. I found out that I was GBS positive again, but was given a different option, which is called risk-based protocol, meaning that you only receive IV antibiotics if your water has been broken for more than 18 hours or you have a fever. That was my plan and I was reassured time and time again by the midwife I regularly saw that it was a completely acceptable option, even according to the CDC. However, when the midwives came in, apparently they didn't get the same memo and started pushing IV antibiotics and suggested that while I was not going to have them that they not check me to avoid potentially introducing bacteria. They also mentioned that my labor had slowed down quite a bit and didn't want to check me because they were suggesting that I would most likely need to have pitocin to speed up my labor because of my water breaking and meconium being present. This was incredibly discouraging to me and I decided to think about what I should do.
After they left the room, I spoke with Meagan about it and she reminded me that these midwives have never seen me labor before so they couldn't possibly know how far I had progressed. She had seen me labor before and since I labor well, she thought that I was further into it than they were suggesting. She said that it is completely normal to arrive at the hospital and for it to disrupt labor and slow it down. She thought it would pick up and I'd have the baby sooner rather than later. It was around 4 or 5 in the morning at this time. While we were talking, a pediatrician came in to talk to me about the IV antibiotics. I told her that I was open to the conversation, but I needed to think and didn't want to have the conversation right then. After she left the room, I spoke with Justin about it and ultimately we decided that we felt more comfortable with going ahead with getting the antibiotics. We requested that they send in anesthesiology to place the line since at Cora's birth, the nurse who attempted it blew my vein. Once the antibiotics were going, it really seemed that labor had picked back up, contractions were coming faster and stronger. I was annoyed with the IV in my arm, but it wasn't as uncomfortable as it was with Cora.
One of the things I was insistent on with this birth was that I was going to be an active participant so I didn't just lay on the bed and let labor happen to me. I got into different positions, I stood up, I used a birth ball, I got up to go to the bathroom and sat on the toilet backwards (so weird, but apparently it helps...). I drank lots of water so I could avoid having to have IV fluids. For the most part everything was going well and I made sure to keep my thoughts positive. I was especially trying to block out the idea of having to have pitocin to speed things up, as that is one of my bigger fears. During all of my yoga sessions leading up to the birth, I had come up with a mantra to keep in mind while I labored. Relax. Accept. Enjoy. I kept repeating that to myself whenever things would get hard. Meagan and Justin worked their magic with counterpressure and emotional support as I moved about the room.
Around 7 a.m. the midwives changed shifts and Abby Rizk, CNM came in. Upon seeing me, she thought that I would probably be having the baby in the next few hours. Since I had had the antibiotics, she checked my dilation and I was at a 7 and baby was in a 0 station. I don't remember what she said my effacement was at that time. I was encouraged by this and knew we were not that far out. Labor was getting harder and harder, but I was still trying to stay positive. However, I was getting very tired. The contractions were so close together that it was impossible to rest much in between them. After awhile, she checked me again and I was only at an 8.
Things get kind of fuzzy around here because this is where things really got difficult and I'm not sure of all the details. I started having an insane urge to push during contractions and they told me to blow out my lips to keep myself from pushing. I was very insistent that I knew where Justin was during this point and would sometimes squeeze his or Meagan's hands as hard as I could during contractions. I started using nitrous oxide (Call the Midwives "gas and air" :-D ) during contractions, which doesn't take the pain away, but distracts and relaxes you. At some point, Abby decided that she thought I was dilating to a complete when I was contracting, but not in between. She decided to check my cervix during a contraction to see if that was the case. Upon doing this, she discovered that there was still a forebag of waters that hadn't broken - even though I had been leaking amniotic fluid all night. During the next contraction, she broke that bag of waters. I still was not reaching completion after some time so the midwife again checked me during a contraction where she discovered that I just had a lip of cervix and manually stretched it for me to reach completion. I have no idea how long this whole process took, but it was probably the most painful experience of my entire life and it wasn't over yet. In between contractions, I just kept saying how tired I was and that I just wanted her out. Just as I was asking why I was still on my back (having to be in the position for her to check and manipulate my cervix), I started having another contraction and the midwife told me to push as hard as I possibly could. I definitely felt her crowning this time where I hadn't felt it with Cora because of the pain in my back. She then told us that the baby's shoulder was stuck and had to manipulate her to move it past my pelvis. I wanted to move onto my hands and knees at this point because I had read in one of my birth books that the best way to move a baby whose shoulder is stuck is to get onto your hands and knees, but I experienced another contraction and she asked me to push again.
I remember when giving birth to Cora that pushing was a relief and it was over so soon. Pushing was fast and furious this time too, but it was absolutely excruciating. When she finally was out, she was placed upon my stomach where I kept asking, "Is she okay? Is she okay?" Justin cut the cord and they handed her off to the pediatrician team to look her over. While she was over at the table, they were waiting for the placenta to come and apparently I was bleeding a lot. Abby kept pushing on my stomach as hard as she could. It was very painful. I had wanted the placenta to come out naturally, but because of the bleeding, they suggested starting pitocin. Prior to leaving the labor and delivery room, my bleeding was still not under control and I was given an injection in my leg.
Sedona's Apgars were good and after LOTS of suctioning, she was handed back to me where she promptly latched on and started breastfeeding. All of the trauma of the previous couple of hours forgotten for the moment. I'm not sure exactly how long active labor was, but all in all, it was a pretty quick experience. There are many things about Sedona's birth that were incredibly empowering, but some other things that I have a little frustration with. I am very proud of how I handled this birth and am much more convinced of my strength when it comes to what I want and handling pain. Sedona is wonderful and breastfeeding has been a cinch this time around. She is quite the little piggy and loves to eat, eat, eat.
Recovery so far has been much easier and I had a smaller tear this time as well. I have had a ton of help with my mom retiring as she's been at my house since we left for the hospital. I am feeling mostly back to normal and am having to remind myself to take it easy and just let recovery happen slowly. Sedona is doing well and so far is showing no signs of injury to her shoulder or arm and was only slightly jaundiced upon leaving the hospital. She was back at her birth weight at day 4 and my milk had already come in.
I was in labor for almost exactly 10 hours. Sedona Quinn Beagley being born at 10:09 a.m. on November 1, 2018 bigger than her sister at 7 pounds, 7 ounces and 19 inches long.
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