Cosette Nanala Beagley was born at 2:29 a.m. on Wednesday, July 20, 2022 at the University of Utah Hospital 6 days before her due date.
Little girl gave us 2 false labor scares: one when I was only 36 weeks, but it was awfully convincing. It was after a day as a family at Cowabunga Bay where I walked the lazy river for hours and went down the most gentle slide over and over again with Sedona. I tried to stay hydrated, but ultimately I think that and all the activity caused hours of consistent every 4 minute contractions. It was a bit panic inducing as my mom hadn't come back from spending time with my brother and his family in Seattle yet and most of my other support systems were out of town for the July 4th holiday. My friend Halley who I had asked to potentially attend the birth was also out of town (She actually ended up being out of town for the actual birth too, but we knew that was a possibility if I actually went early, which I didn't think I would because both Cora and Sedona were late.). Fortunately, my friend Julie, who is 2 weeks behind me in pregnancy, was available and willing to potentially spend the night on my couch. I called the midwives and they were about as stumped as I was, but told me to take a shower and do some cat/cows and see if contractions calmed down or come in after an hour with no change. The contractions finally spaced out and then stopped and I called off Julie and went to bed. I made it my mission to be as hydrated as possible for the next few weeks because I wasn't cool with the false labor.
Spent the next couple of weeks enjoying my girls and spending time with friends and going to Park City for a (nonrefundable) babymoon with Justin. We even took the girls for a day at Cherry Hill. I found myself getting impatient. Like, I was fine if she took her time, but could I just know the exact date and time she was coming, please??? I really enjoyed my weekend in Park City with Justin with tons of good food and a hot tub that was broken so was just cool enough that I was fine to use it and let the jets massage my tailbone. Went and got a prenatal couples massage with Julie and nursed my sore pregnant body with chiropractor appointments. I was able to finish up to 38 weeks on the SLAM pregnancy workout program that I was doing.
On the Monday before she was born, I did a weight training working with the aim to open up the pelvis and bring baby down. Also, because of a late ultrasound due to having COVID in June and exams in the office, we knew that I was once again dealing with a sunny-side up baby (meaning her head was facing towards the front of my body as opposed to the back which is the optimal position to come out) so I was hoping between that workout and spinning babies that I could coax her to turn around. Very, very early Tuesday morning, I had a gush of fluid followed by contractions that came every 6 to 26 minutes... not consistent, not getting any stronger - so I was very confused about what was going on.
I had an appointment early Tuesday morning so I took Justin with me just in case we found out my water had broken and we needed to go to the hospital. At the appointment, the provider tested my cervix and said that it was not amniotic fluid and informed me I was only dilated to a 1 and 50% effaced. She seemed pretty confident that she would be seeing me the following week at my 40 week appointment. Justin and I hit up Smith's Marketplace on the way home so I could grab the last of the supplies I needed for the birth and I went about my day. I made banana bread muffins, freezer bean burritos, gave the girls a bath - all while having these inconsistent contractions. I sent my mom home since there was no indication that anything was changing.
We put the girls down for bed and I decided to do another exercise with the aim of convincing the baby to get into a better position for birth. It is called the Miles Circuit. It is a series of 3 moves that takes 90 minutes to complete, spending 30 minutes in each position. The first position is a heart to earth pose that was really difficult for me to hold for 30 minutes, but with the aid of Justin massaging my upper back, I pushed through. Secondly, you lie in an exaggerated left side-lying position for 30 minutes - easy peasy except for the contractions I was still experiencing. Lastly, you spend 30 minutes moving trying to keep your pelvis in an asymmetrical position. I did "curb walking" on my aerobics step, side to side lunges, and circles on the yoga ball. I had Justin help me with one more exercise that is supposed to hinge open your pelvis. Afterwards, I told Justin I was going to go up to bed and try to rest between the inconsistent contractions I was still having.
I lied down in bed and had another contraction and once again felt a gush of fluid, got up to check on it and it was very clear that this time - it was in fact my water that had broken. I called down to Justin that my water had broken and I was going to call my mom to come over. This was at about 10:45 p.m. I checked my hospital bag and called the midwife on call number to make sure that they thought I should come in. I forgot to turn my phone off Do Not Disturb, but the midwife called me back and said, "You're about 40 minutes away from the hospital and this is your third baby. Don't call back, just come in." I called Labor and Delivery to let them know that I would be coming in shortly. My mom got to our house around 11 and we left for the hospital around 11:30.
At this point, contractions were coming every 2 minutes and I could no longer do anything during them and they were definitely getting stronger. Once in the car, they slowed down a bit, but kept up the intensity. The ride to the hospital was mostly enjoyable getting to talk to Justin about the fact that I was ACTUALLY in labor and various other things. I felt very excited and very close to Justin and just happy. I did snap at him twice on the way there during contractions. Once when he asked me what way I would prefer him to take to the hospital ("JUST MAKE A DECISION") and secondly when he asked about a pressure point we were using on my hand and whether it was even doing anything ("WELL YOU NEED TO DO SOMETHING!"). We got to the hospital a little after 12 and they took us up to Labor and Delivery Triage.
This was my least favorite part of labor. I hate triage. I hate being hooked up to the baby heart rate monitor and blood oxygen clip. They did the test and confirmed that my water had broken, checked my cervix and I was dilated to a 3.5. I was admitted because my water had already broken. Justin assures me that we were only in triage for about 45 minutes to an hour, but it felt like we were there for hours on end. I spent most of the time lying on my side and Justin applying pressure to my hip during each contraction. At some point, I noticed that in between contractions, Justin was watching Seinfeld. I very rudely noticed it during some heated moment where I could hear Elaine screaming at one of the other characters. I do. not. like. Seinfeld - and the last thing I want during some of the most trying moments of my life when I'm trying to stay cool and collected is to listen to people on Seinfeld argue. I mentioned it to Justin and suggested that he change it to some music. He ended up putting on Local Natives and it was the perfect soundtrack that I could listen to and ignore as I so pleased. This whole exchange makes me smile thinking about it... because what the hell was he thinking???
When the nurse came in and asked about an IV, I told them that I didn't want one - and was very excited to not get any pushback. Backstory: I have been GBS positive with both Cora and Sedona's birth. With Cora's birth, an IV was attempted and the medical assistant blew my vein. I was also allergic to the tape they used for that and the IV that ended up working. I went home bruised and my skin ripped off where the tape was. They kept the IV in for a long time after the birth and it itched like crazy. For Sedona's birth, I was told that I could take a different approach to the IV antibiotics and instead arrived at the hospital to being guilt tripped into antibiotics while I was vulnerable and in labor. It was placed (at extra cost) by anesthesiology so I did have less of an issue with it. I was SO relieved to be GBS negative this time around so that I didn't have to deal with ANY of that.
Finally YEARS later (around 1:45), they admitted us to Labor and Delivery. We walked into a large room that definitely seemed more updated and nice than the rooms I'd been in previously. The midwife, Izzy Armstrong, greeted us and let me know that the tub was ready for me to get in. I was excited that it was her that was there because this was the first time that the midwife on call was one that I had actually met before and I thought she was kind and sweet and a good person to help deliver my baby.
The tub???? Have I mentioned anything about wanting a waterbirth??????
When I was pregnant with Cora, I was determined that I was going to birth in the water - but between my water breaking and meconium being present and not really feeling the magical pain relief that I've heard other women speaking of - I wasn't that in love with the idea when Sedona came around - and at this point really didn't think it was a thing that was going to happen for me. 6 months ago at one of my midwife appointments, they asked me if I wanted a water birth and I lackadaisically said, "yeah, sure". Even day of I was thinking to myself that sure, I'd labor in the water - but I'd probably get out and end up having the baby "on land" on the bed. This all makes me laugh so hard because not once have I mentioned to Justin during this pregnancy that I was going to have a waterbirth and true to Justin fashion, he didn't question it and just went with it. I talked to the midwife as I was getting ready to get in the tub and told her that the contractions were coming fast and long and I didn't feel like I was getting much of a break. I was so tired.
I climbed in the tub and immediately felt more relaxed. The contractions didn't feel any better or less strong, but at least in between them my body felt loose, supported, and good. Justin continued to apply counter pressure to my back any time I had a contraction and I asked the midwife how we were going to know how much longer I had. She let me know that she could check my cervix any time I wanted and see where my progress was. The only number I had to go off of was the number I was admitted with, a 3.5. She said that her and the nurses were going to leave the room and come back in 30 minutes to check on me. I took this to mean that she felt I wasn't going to be having this baby for at least another couple of hours and attempted to manage my expectations. She told us to hit the call light if I felt the urge to push.
Contractions were still coming on fast and strong and I wasn't getting much of a break. I had another strong contraction and felt a "pop" and told Justin that likely the rest of my water had broken from what had only been a small leak from earlier. I had another contraction and had the thought was that a push? Another contraction came and I thought to myself, I'm pretty sure that was a push. I was just about to tell Justin to hit the call light when another contraction came on and I just started screaming. An intense amount of pressure was happening in the front and back of my pelvis and at this point all I could do was scream. Up to that point, I had managed all my contractions with a very low moan as anything higher pitched causes more pain as your body tenses up, but there was no controlling the noise that was coming out of me at this point. The midwife and the nurses came running in the room at the sounds that I was making, exclaiming! "Are you having your baby?"
The midwife made it to the tub and said, "Your baby's head is out. Could you sit back so it is easier for us to help her come out?" Justin reached his hand in the water to catch the baby, but couldn't really get a good hold on her. I had another terrifyingly strong contraction/push where nothing really happened - and the midwife reached in and very gently tugged on the baby during the final contraction to help deliver her shoulders and Cosette was officially earthside at 2:29 a.m. and placed on my chest. Active labor had lasted just under 4 hours and my baby was out in 4 pushes, less than 10 minutes. She immediately started making little noises as they stimulated her and put warm wet towels on her to keep her warm. She stayed on my chest until her cord stopped pulsing and Justin cut the cord. I was then helped out of the tub towards the bed to deliver the placenta.
Delivering the placenta was much worse than I remember it being with the other two, but its possible that I have just blocked that all out. I had minimal bleeding and no tearing. I was shocked and absolutely thrilled about how everything had just gone and so relieved that it had happened so quickly. Cosette didn't take to breastfeeding as quickly as Sedona did, but I was able to get her to latch not too long after she was born after some trial and error. We delayed any shots, denied the eye ointment and spent 2 wonderful hours just falling in love with our little girl. We were hoping to be moved into another room but we informed that because there were 18 total births that night, they didn't have a postpartum room available for us and ended up spending about 12 hours in labor and delivery. I was super anxious about this because we were in one of only two tub rooms and I didn't want another mom to miss out on laboring in the tub because I was occupying the room. I marvel at my luck that without a real plan in place, I managed to get one of two tub rooms with 18 births that night.
We never made it to the postpartum unit and instead were given the smallest and most inconvenient room on the women's unit, usually meant for women on bed rest or that have had surgeries. The bed moved constantly to prevent bed sores and made me feel like I was a sea with the constant movement when I was sleeping. We ended up only staying 24 hours because I was anxious to get home to see my two other little loves. Everything continued to go well and honestly I was so elated that I couldn't be bothered by any small inconveniences such as a crappy room and crappy moving bed. We found out later that the nurses had asked my labor and delivery nurses about my waterbirth and they were told that neither of them had seen a water birth before so I guess it is not something that happens at the hospital very frequently. Every nurse that I had over the day/night we were there had lots of questions for me about the birth.
Honestly - I don't think that anything could have gone better. Justin was perfectly present and it felt amazing and intimate to be so supported and loved by him. Thanks to a suggestion by one of the midwives that I saw and a GBS cocktail of zinc, garlic, and a female specific probiotic, I avoided needing an IV and antibiotics during labor this time. I had a beautiful waterbirth, delayed cord clamping, and she was figuring out nursing. Absolutely on cloud 9.
A few people have asked questions about Cosette's name. Growing up, we lived next to this wonderful family and I was lucky enough to be able to babysit the children from about the age of 13 or so until I went off to college. They all hold a very special place in my heart. One of the girls passed away 2 years ago and it was very hard on me - making me rethink so many things about my life, the way I approached it - and wishing that maybe I'd done some things differently - and also being so grateful that I got to know her and that I will always get to carry her and her family in my heart. When we were naming Cosette, I wanted something to be in tribute to Baylie. Baylie loved sunflowers so we set out to find a name that meant sunflower. Nanala means sunflower in a Hawaiian language and it seemed perfect. Cosette means "Little thing" and also "victorious" so we took her name to mean "Little Sunflower". My hope is that she will bring joy to everyone who experiences her just like Baylie does for so many people and that we can continue to carry her with us in our hearts.
We are so glad that you're here little Cosi! We love you and can't wait to get to know you. 💖
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